The Kindzia Blog

Need For Patience - October 11, 2009

I keep a copy of Jason Massie's training plan handy as he is also doing the Rocket City Marathon on December 12, 2009 as a Boston Qualifier.  I find myself comparing what I laid out for myself vs. what he has laid out for himself.

With workouts like today, I try to keep things in perspective and remind myself of a need for patience.  His plan was calling for a 20-miler at 8:10 pace.  I love the way he builds in progressive overload on speed and endurance.  For example, he would do progressive long runs like the following;

Oh Man - October 6, 2009

I got an email today that you just don't want to get.  It was from a friend, who shall remain anonymous for privacy reasons, and in a nutshell wrote;

I got the bad news from the doctor.  We confirmed that my aortic valve is still leaking in my heart (same condition that forced Torbjorn Sinballe into retirement) but is at a manageable level.  But last week my doctor discovered that my aorta is enlarged (the main artery that carries blood out of the heart (think of a balloon as you stretch it out and it eventually bursts.)  In the meantime, until they could see clearly how bad it is (which requires more testing) no more racing, no more long runs and no more hard stuff.

The cure is that I will have to eventually have surgery to have the aorta, and valve replaced.  But once that happens, I will be able to run all the marathons I want...

Oh, is that all?  Back to full racing after you have heart surgery you say?  I thought you were going to tell me something alarming like you caught the flu or something...

Oh man, sometimes I just feel like crying.  But that doesn't really help the situation (or the person impacted by the news).  And now what do you say to yourself, "Gosh, I'm glad that isn't me?!?!"  Is that what we are supposed to do?  I'm definitely not thinking, "Why didn't that happen to me instead of him?"  That didn't go through my mind.  I think that only takes place between a parent and a sick child where the parent would swap positions with their own child.

Now the good news (and there really is good news) is that medical care is being implemented BEFORE another Steve Larson episode.  One way to ruin your day is to drop dead while finishing a fartlek at the end of a long run...

By the numbers;

• 185.2 - today's weight (January 1, 2009 weight was 184.2).  Goal weight for 10/25/09 is 165.
• 18 - days until the Marine Corp Marathon
• 232 - Total days trained in 2009
• 0.00 - Miles run today
• 238.25 - Miles on current pair of shoes
• 1,193.75 - Miles run in 2009

Authentic Accountability - October 5, 2009

I'm back on a reading binge the last few weeks.  I think the only time where I've been at a faster pace was the first chunk of 2008.  I actually started a list in 2008 (of course, another list...) of the books that I read and I actually found that list yesterday.  I was surprised at how many books I actually cranked out in only a few months.

But I'm on a real tear and most of the books are business in nature and how the business environment has changed with social media and technology.  In the olden days, those companies with big budgets could just buy T.V. ad space and print ad space and then just go on to printing money.  People believed what they saw and read.

Stress, Anxiety and Worry - July 28, 2008

I often believe that we seek out and find stress, anxiety and worry.  This happens regardless of our circumstances.  Simply put, no matter our situation in life, we'll find something (or many things) to worry about.  I often like to think in terms of extremes and use extremes to help me in my thought process or analysis with issues.  Once I start at the extreme, I'll then move towards the middle and see if my examples hold up to solidify my theories on things. 

Here's an example of using the Kindzia method of extremes to test human behavior;

First, I want to envision a truly stressful situation in life (an extreme) that I might not even be able to fully comprehend.  Let's pretend that I'm living in Darfur, Africa.  Rebels have killed off many of my family members, the government is corrupt and is backing their own militia which is responsible for raping women and killing children.  Financial wealth is non-existent.  My home was burned by the rebels.  There is no organized health care, my safety and the safety of my family is constantly at risk and I'm forced to be a refugee living in a tent at a camp that relies on infrequent food distributions from global aid organizations.  I dream of an ice-cold Coca-Cola.  The closest Starbucks is about 2,000 miles away.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I think it would be overwhelming at times.

Next, let's make some improvements in my life.  Now, rather than living in Darfur, a third world living hell, I live in Iraq as an Iraqi citizen.  I have a home, some very basic utilities, access to food and there is a government that is attempting to improve the situation.  In-between limited work, I have access to basic healthcare, clothing and local transportation, but there is still random car bombings, unlawful citizens, a war going on in the neighborhood, corrupt militia's and a split government. 

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I think it would be overwhelming at times (especially each time a car bomb goes off and kills people that I know.)

Next, let's go a place in Eastern Europe (more improvements).  Gone are militia's and car bombs.  The government is running a nice and comfy socialistic society.  I am assured food and basic healthcare.  I have a house (albeit a small one) and my family is safe from random violence.  I have freedom to go places.  I have a job.  But I'm stressed because I can't get ahead in life.  I can't be entrepreneurial, obtain work more, be creative or try new things.  Getting by and trying to keep my head above water is the perpetual norm.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I would feel stressed, despondent and anxious of my situation.  I don't have enough to fill my needs.

We continue until we get into the United States.  I'm now low middle class, maybe even "poverty" by economic definition.  I live in a free country.  There are no wars going on in my back yard.  I have cable TV, Internet, food, transportation, access to jobs (or multiple jobs), clothing, education and a personal cell phone.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - You betcha.  I'm a living stress case living on the lower rung of the social ladder in America.  "The Man" is keeping me down.  I can't get ahead and can barely keep my head above water.

I'm now upper middle class in the United States.  I work in an office, with air conditioning.  I eat at restaurants quite a bit.  I usually have a car that is less than 3 years old.  I have a 4 bedroom house.  My kids go to a nice public school.  I vacation twice a year.  I have health insurance, car insurance and homeowners insurance.  I have season tickets for my college football team. 

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - "Yes.  My kids need college education money.  I have a high car payment.  My mortgage rate re-adjusts in 4 months.  I didn't get the big promotion that I was counting on.  My wife keeps nagging me to cut the grass, paint the bedroom, and help with the laundry more often.  I'm behind on retirement savings.  I want a bigger house and a nicer car.  My credit card bills are starting to escalate.  The big screen TV will need replacing soon to plasma.  My cellphone is so old school.  I need an iPhone."

That's when I realized, it doesn't matter our circumstances.  We don't have extreme stress in our lives but sometimes we create it.  Do we REALLY have problems or are we creating situations that lead to problems (that are far from life threatening).  How many things are we stressed about, anxious about and worried about that really don't matter in the scope of life?

Stress is real and it has a real impact on our health and well being.  It causes increases in blood pressure, poor sleeping habits, dependency on drugs, depression, amongst other things.  Are we doing everything we can to create a life that is less stressful or are the decisions we make each day contributing to our stress?

Stress, Anxiety and Worry - July 28, 2008

I often believe that we seek out and find stress, anxiety and worry.  This happens regardless of our circumstances.  Simply put, no matter our situation in life, we'll find something (or many things) to worry about.  I often like to think in terms of extremes and use extremes to help me in my thought process or analysis with issues.  Once I start at the extreme, I'll then move towards the middle and see if my examples hold up to solidify my theories on things. 

Here's an example of using the Kindzia method of extremes to test human behavior;

First, I want to envision a truly stressful situation in life (an extreme) that I might not even be able to fully comprehend.  Let's pretend that I'm living in Darfur, Africa.  Rebels have killed off many of my family members, the government is corrupt and is backing their own militia which is responsible for raping women and killing children.  Financial wealth is non-existent.  My home was burned by the rebels.  There is no organized health care, my safety and the safety of my family is constantly at risk and I'm forced to be a refugee living in a tent at a camp that relies on infrequent food distributions from global aid organizations.  I dream of an ice-cold Coca-Cola.  The closest Starbucks is about 2,000 miles away.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I think it would be overwhelming at times.

Next, let's make some improvements in my life.  Now, rather than living in Darfur, a third world living hell, I live in Iraq as an Iraqi citizen.  I have a home, some very basic utilities, access to food and there is a government that is attempting to improve the situation.  In-between limited work, I have access to basic healthcare, clothing and local transportation, but there is still random car bombings, unlawful citizens, a war going on in the neighborhood, corrupt militia's and a split government. 

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I think it would be overwhelming at times (especially each time a car bomb goes off and kills people that I know.)

Next, let's go a place in Eastern Europe (more improvements).  Gone are militia's and car bombs.  The government is running a nice and comfy socialistic society.  I am assured food and basic healthcare.  I have a house (albeit a small one) and my family is safe from random violence.  I have freedom to go places.  I have a job.  But I'm stressed because I can't get ahead in life.  I can't be entrepreneurial, obtain work more, be creative or try new things.  Getting by and trying to keep my head above water is the perpetual norm.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I would feel stressed, despondent and anxious of my situation.  I don't have enough to fill my needs.

We continue until we get into the United States.  I'm now low middle class, maybe even "poverty" by economic definition.  I live in a free country.  There are no wars going on in my back yard.  I have cable TV, Internet, food, transportation, access to jobs (or multiple jobs), clothing, education and a personal cell phone.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - You betcha.  I'm a living stress case living on the lower rung of the social ladder in America.  "The Man" is keeping me down.  I can't get ahead and can barely keep my head above water.

I'm now upper middle class in the United States.  I work in an office, with air conditioning.  I eat at restaurants quite a bit.  I usually have a car that is less than 3 years old.  I have a 4 bedroom house.  My kids go to a nice public school.  I vacation twice a year.  I have health insurance, car insurance and homeowners insurance.  I have season tickets for my college football team. 

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - "Yes.  My kids need college education money.  I have a high car payment.  My mortgage rate re-adjusts in 4 months.  I didn't get the big promotion that I was counting on.  My wife keeps nagging me to cut the grass, paint the bedroom, and help with the laundry more often.  I'm behind on retirement savings.  I want a bigger house and a nicer car.  My credit card bills are starting to escalate.  The big screen TV will need replacing soon to plasma.  My cellphone is so old school.  I need an iPhone."

That's when I realized, it doesn't matter our circumstances.  We don't have extreme stress in our lives but sometimes we create it.  Do we REALLY have problems or are we creating situations that lead to problems (that are far from life threatening).  How many things are we stressed about, anxious about and worried about that really don't matter in the scope of life?

Stress is real and it has a real impact on our health and well being.  It causes increases in blood pressure, poor sleeping habits, dependency on drugs, depression, amongst other things.  Are we doing everything we can to create a life that is less stressful or are the decisions we make each day contributing to our stress?

Stress, Anxiety and Worry - July 28, 2008

I often believe that we seek out and find stress, anxiety and worry.  This happens regardless of our circumstances.  Simply put, no matter our situation in life, we'll find something (or many things) to worry about.  I often like to think in terms of extremes and use extremes to help me in my thought process or analysis with issues.  Once I start at the extreme, I'll then move towards the middle and see if my examples hold up to solidify my theories on things. 

Here's an example of using the Kindzia method of extremes to test human behavior;

First, I want to envision a truly stressful situation in life (an extreme) that I might not even be able to fully comprehend.  Let's pretend that I'm living in Darfur, Africa.  Rebels have killed off many of my family members, the government is corrupt and is backing their own militia which is responsible for raping women and killing children.  Financial wealth is non-existent.  My home was burned by the rebels.  There is no organized health care, my safety and the safety of my family is constantly at risk and I'm forced to be a refugee living in a tent at a camp that relies on infrequent food distributions from global aid organizations.  I dream of an ice-cold Coca-Cola.  The closest Starbucks is about 2,000 miles away.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I think it would be overwhelming at times.

Next, let's make some improvements in my life.  Now, rather than living in Darfur, a third world living hell, I live in Iraq as an Iraqi citizen.  I have a home, some very basic utilities, access to food and there is a government that is attempting to improve the situation.  In-between limited work, I have access to basic healthcare, clothing and local transportation, but there is still random car bombings, unlawful citizens, a war going on in the neighborhood, corrupt militia's and a split government. 

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I think it would be overwhelming at times (especially each time a car bomb goes off and kills people that I know.)

Next, let's go a place in Eastern Europe (more improvements).  Gone are militia's and car bombs.  The government is running a nice and comfy socialistic society.  I am assured food and basic healthcare.  I have a house (albeit a small one) and my family is safe from random violence.  I have freedom to go places.  I have a job.  But I'm stressed because I can't get ahead in life.  I can't be entrepreneurial, obtain work more, be creative or try new things.  Getting by and trying to keep my head above water is the perpetual norm.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - Yes, I would feel stressed, despondent and anxious of my situation.  I don't have enough to fill my needs.

We continue until we get into the United States.  I'm now low middle class, maybe even "poverty" by economic definition.  I live in a free country.  There are no wars going on in my back yard.  I have cable TV, Internet, food, transportation, access to jobs (or multiple jobs), clothing, education and a personal cell phone.

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - You betcha.  I'm a living stress case living on the lower rung of the social ladder in America.  "The Man" is keeping me down.  I can't get ahead and can barely keep my head above water.

I'm now upper middle class in the United States.  I work in an office, with air conditioning.  I eat at restaurants quite a bit.  I usually have a car that is less than 3 years old.  I have a 4 bedroom house.  My kids go to a nice public school.  I vacation twice a year.  I have health insurance, car insurance and homeowners insurance.  I have season tickets for my college football team. 

Question - "Do I feel stress, anxiety and worry?"  Answer - "Yes.  My kids need college education money.  I have a high car payment.  My mortgage rate re-adjusts in 4 months.  I didn't get the big promotion that I was counting on.  My wife keeps nagging me to cut the grass, paint the bedroom, and help with the laundry more often.  I'm behind on retirement savings.  I want a bigger house and a nicer car.  My credit card bills are starting to escalate.  The big screen TV will need replacing soon to plasma.  My cellphone is so old school.  I need an iPhone."

That's when I realized, it doesn't matter our circumstances.  We don't have extreme stress in our lives but sometimes we create it.  Do we REALLY have problems or are we creating situations that lead to problems (that are far from life threatening).  How many things are we stressed about, anxious about and worried about that really don't matter in the scope of life?

Stress is real and it has a real impact on our health and well being.  It causes increases in blood pressure, poor sleeping habits, dependency on drugs, depression, amongst other things.  Are we doing everything we can to create a life that is less stressful or are the decisions we make each day contributing to our stress?

The Effects of Stress - July 14, 2008

Stress has evolved as humanity has evolved.  Long ago, our ancestors didn't suffer less stress than us, they just experienced a different kind of stress.  They didn't have washing machines, microwave ovens, Whole Foods grocery stores, 6 cylinder automobiles, Pearl Jam CD's, or the ability to text their spouse with questions like, "What are we having for dinner tonight?"

Our ancestors were probably worrying about a saber-tooth tiger jumping out of a bush when they were seeking a cure for their munchies.  Today, our stress is social stress.  It rarely is physical stress.  The stress takes a toll on us emotionally and mentally.

One common cause of stress is the feeling of a "lack of control" in our own lives.  The less we perceive control over our daily actions, the higher the tendency to experience emotional and mental stress. 

The effects of stress are real.  Stress impacts our concentration (and not for the better).  Consistent stress impacts our brain's natural balance of chemicals.  Other common effects of stress are high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes, stomach problems, headaches and depression.  As the level of stress rises and continues, so does the concentration of cortisol in our bloodstream.  Increased levels of cortisol negatively impacts our immune system making us more vulnerable to sicknesses and diseases.

It's important to keep things in perspective of what we can control and what we can't.  Some things are way beyond our control.  In other instances, the decisions we made in our lives have had a cumulative effect on our current circumstances.  If we constantly make decisions that benefit short term satisfaction over long term well being, it's easy to corner ourselves into very stressful situations.  Consider the following situations;

• Rather than eating a healthy meal, we justify to ourselves why we deserve food that places taste over nutrition.  We continue to repeat this habit over days, weeks, months and years.  We eventually find ourselves in poor health.
• Rather than being prudent with our financial resources, we justify to ourselves why we deserve to purchase goods and services, often on credit, rather than saving money.  We eventually find ourselves in a poor financial situation.
• Rather than pro-actively scheduling downtime in our daily, weekly and monthly lives, we over commit to social functions.  We eventually find ourselves running around like chickens with our heads cut off rather than enjoying some downtime.

Eventually, in life, problems arise.  Sometimes the problems can be solved.  Other times, they really can't.  If a problem is solvable, there isn't really a need to worry.  For the problem can be solved and thus all we need to do is correct it.  If a problem can't be solved, it doesn't make sense to worry extra about it either.  For the problem can't be solved.  There is simply nothing that we can do about it.

"I've suffered a great many catastrophes in my life.  Most of them never happened." - Mark Twain

The Effects of Stress - July 14, 2008

Stress has evolved as humanity has evolved.  Long ago, our ancestors didn't suffer less stress than us, they just experienced a different kind of stress.  They didn't have washing machines, microwave ovens, Whole Foods grocery stores, 6 cylinder automobiles, Pearl Jam CD's, or the ability to text their spouse with questions like, "What are we having for dinner tonight?"

Our ancestors were probably worrying about a saber-tooth tiger jumping out of a bush when they were seeking a cure for their munchies.  Today, our stress is social stress.  It rarely is physical stress.  The stress takes a toll on us emotionally and mentally.

One common cause of stress is the feeling of a "lack of control" in our own lives.  The less we perceive control over our daily actions, the higher the tendency to experience emotional and mental stress. 

The effects of stress are real.  Stress impacts our concentration (and not for the better).  Consistent stress impacts our brain's natural balance of chemicals.  Other common effects of stress are high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes, stomach problems, headaches and depression.  As the level of stress rises and continues, so does the concentration of cortisol in our bloodstream.  Increased levels of cortisol negatively impacts our immune system making us more vulnerable to sicknesses and diseases.

It's important to keep things in perspective of what we can control and what we can't.  Some things are way beyond our control.  In other instances, the decisions we made in our lives have had a cumulative effect on our current circumstances.  If we constantly make decisions that benefit short term satisfaction over long term well being, it's easy to corner ourselves into very stressful situations.  Consider the following situations;

• Rather than eating a healthy meal, we justify to ourselves why we deserve food that places taste over nutrition.  We continue to repeat this habit over days, weeks, months and years.  We eventually find ourselves in poor health.
• Rather than being prudent with our financial resources, we justify to ourselves why we deserve to purchase goods and services, often on credit, rather than saving money.  We eventually find ourselves in a poor financial situation.
• Rather than pro-actively scheduling downtime in our daily, weekly and monthly lives, we over commit to social functions.  We eventually find ourselves running around like chickens with our heads cut off rather than enjoying some downtime.

Eventually, in life, problems arise.  Sometimes the problems can be solved.  Other times, they really can't.  If a problem is solvable, there isn't really a need to worry.  For the problem can be solved and thus all we need to do is correct it.  If a problem can't be solved, it doesn't make sense to worry extra about it either.  For the problem can't be solved.  There is simply nothing that we can do about it.

"I've suffered a great many catastrophes in my life.  Most of them never happened." - Mark Twain

The Effects of Stress - July 14, 2008

Stress has evolved as humanity has evolved.  Long ago, our ancestors didn't suffer less stress than us, they just experienced a different kind of stress.  They didn't have washing machines, microwave ovens, Whole Foods grocery stores, 6 cylinder automobiles, Pearl Jam CD's, or the ability to text their spouse with questions like, "What are we having for dinner tonight?"

Our ancestors were probably worrying about a saber-tooth tiger jumping out of a bush when they were seeking a cure for their munchies.  Today, our stress is social stress.  It rarely is physical stress.  The stress takes a toll on us emotionally and mentally.

One common cause of stress is the feeling of a "lack of control" in our own lives.  The less we perceive control over our daily actions, the higher the tendency to experience emotional and mental stress. 

The effects of stress are real.  Stress impacts our concentration (and not for the better).  Consistent stress impacts our brain's natural balance of chemicals.  Other common effects of stress are high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes, stomach problems, headaches and depression.  As the level of stress rises and continues, so does the concentration of cortisol in our bloodstream.  Increased levels of cortisol negatively impacts our immune system making us more vulnerable to sicknesses and diseases.

It's important to keep things in perspective of what we can control and what we can't.  Some things are way beyond our control.  In other instances, the decisions we made in our lives have had a cumulative effect on our current circumstances.  If we constantly make decisions that benefit short term satisfaction over long term well being, it's easy to corner ourselves into very stressful situations.  Consider the following situations;

• Rather than eating a healthy meal, we justify to ourselves why we deserve food that places taste over nutrition.  We continue to repeat this habit over days, weeks, months and years.  We eventually find ourselves in poor health.
• Rather than being prudent with our financial resources, we justify to ourselves why we deserve to purchase goods and services, often on credit, rather than saving money.  We eventually find ourselves in a poor financial situation.
• Rather than pro-actively scheduling downtime in our daily, weekly and monthly lives, we over commit to social functions.  We eventually find ourselves running around like chickens with our heads cut off rather than enjoying some downtime.

Eventually, in life, problems arise.  Sometimes the problems can be solved.  Other times, they really can't.  If a problem is solvable, there isn't really a need to worry.  For the problem can be solved and thus all we need to do is correct it.  If a problem can't be solved, it doesn't make sense to worry extra about it either.  For the problem can't be solved.  There is simply nothing that we can do about it.

"I've suffered a great many catastrophes in my life.  Most of them never happened." - Mark Twain

Reassessment - June 14, 2008

I have been deeply saddened and troubled since learning that newsman Tim Russert passed away at work of an apparent heart attack.  He was 58.  I'm sure there are no shortages of people that immediately thought, "58!  That is SO YOUNG!"

It is young.  It's too young.  He left behind a wife, a son, a lot of co-workers and many friends. 

Tom Brokaw made mention how he and Tim were trying to lose weight "together" and that Tim had already lost about 10 pounds prior to the tragic event.

The news game, just like many high profile careers push the participants to the limits and there is often an environment that makes it that much more difficult to take care of ones health.  Newsmen, and the news game in general is built upon, "beating the other guy to the punch."  The work is relentless, stressful, high-octane, and exciting.  But a lifestyle that revolves around inadequate sleep, poor diets, high amounts of caffeine or other stimulants, low exercise, lots of travel, high stress, and a constant fight against self-imposed deadlines takes a toll on the human body.

Whether Tim died prematurely of genetic or self-imposed factors is not the point of this story.  Rather, the point is to make ourselves aware that what we do, how we behave, our consistent daily routines and habits, all have an impact on us.  Some of these behaviors and habits are very good.  Others, not so good.

It's a tough balance that we all have to strike in life.  Challenging careers make for a lot of personal fulfillment and satisfaction.  To deny ourselves an opportunity to strive for excellence in our chosen passions in life is to deny ourselves access to our own spirit.  But sometimes it is possible to get "more" in life if we slow down and accept "less" in the short run.

We've all burned the candle at both ends.  Heck, some attempt to burn the candle at both ends with a bonfire going in the middle with gasoline on top.  But how much life do we possibly deny ourselves if we check out early?

It's at these times when we lose heroes or friends or family members "too soon" that it allows an opportunity to reassess our own priorities and habits.  Can we do better?  Are we increasing the possibility and probability of accomplishing a bigger goal or objective in life?

I point out something that we all know.  We are all going to die.  It's not a question of "if" as much as a question of "when."  But the timing of our deaths often has a bit more to do with things that we have some control over.  Our goal or purpose is not to live a life that results in us never dying.  That's simply not going to happen.  But perhaps our goal or purpose is to live a life that we maximize the quantity and quality of our lives in an active, vibrant and loving way.

That's when we all have to ask ourselves and hold ourselves accountable, "Are we doing the things necessary each and every day to maximize the quantity and quality of our lives or are we doing things that are actually working against these objectives."  One way or another, we'll all find out if we were right or wrong.